Nothin' like a Lab |
Finally, as we all sat in rapture of this motivational speech, came the kicker, "Some of you might want what you have in the past and may want the comfort of what was familiar... know that change will happen and if you feel the pull of resistance, feel free to move on."
Can I tell you a secret? I cried today at the start of what was to be my first jumping lesson on Maisy. Yes, it was nerves... but there was something more.
For whatever it's worth, good or bad, I knew Sugar. I knew she would be spooky, quick to spin and more often than I liked, I could be spun off. But, I also knew the rhythm of her stride, the cadence of her foot falls, whether the twitch of her ears was a good thing or a warning. I knew her... And, I still miss her...
Friday, I took Maisy over to the City Barn to get her back into the trailer for a short ride AND, if all went well, maybe jump a couple of logs in the XC field or, at least, work out in the open! I did not have my big girl panties on and just did flat work and walked over some of the logs.
Newbie Eventer needed to do ditches and the water complex before her event next week so we hacked over to it. Her steed took a hard look at the complex, rocked backward and bravely went in.
OHEC Water Complex |
Maisy went to the edge hesitantly, dabbled one front hoof in the water and then, I felt started to drop to roll. I was wrong, she gathered her hind end and jumped in, clearing what was a 4' imaginary jump. After completely misjudging her actions, I popped off, mid-air, and landed with a splash dab smack in the center of the complex. Maisy stood there looking at me confused at why I decided to go swimming.
Smiles for the future! |
Dressage Trainer looked at me before today's lesson and knew... She said, "You're wishing that nothing changed, right?" And, I cried. And, then the Wise Woman in her said, "Change can be for the better, right? And, maybe Change will be exactly what you need. Welcome the changes as they happen and be sure you take the time you need... There is no rush."
Then we jumped. Cavelettis to a vertical... nothing huge... Just two girls learning to adjust to life's changes - together... All in good time!
7 comments:
Lovely Suzanne! I was thrown into sudden change this year when my dressage instructor of many years suddenly retired! I have begun riding with a new instructor who has managed to make some significant changes in how I ride my 3rd level horse Red Baron. Change is scary, but change is also good. I can see some 4th level in our future!
Hugs to you. And a quiet, peaceful place to let the tears fall at the loss of your companion. Grief is not banished because you are moving forward. Sometimes, grief and growth sit side by side on your shoulders for a while. It's ok to grieve her loss. Just like it is also okay to move forward with Maisy.
Hugs and peace.
Change is not my favorite either - but I just try to remember all the many good and unexpected things that can come. Like you say - all in good time. Good luck Maisy!
Sigh, this one gets close to home, as you know. Well-captured as always.
I STILL HATE CHANGE. Especially change where there is no closure. For all you out there, don't try that one, there are no words...
I cry a lot.
But the only guarantee there is, is change itself; if only we got to pick what it was! Wise Women are irritatingly right, if only I could get my subconscious to agree!
Albeit my small sample size, I've found it takes about a year to learn a horse. It was actually harder for me with Encore b/c he is a completely different ride than Solo. Both have good, quiet minds, but as you know, riding just Solo for years, Encore made me step up my game. But he also made me a better rider -- they each really do have something to teach us!!
I can't wait to watch you & your darling grey grow together!
Yes. Change, even positive and well-supported change, is hard to process. It's especially hard when it was not entirely of your making. Much love.
Change is so hard and it takes as long as it takes. Hugs.
Ugh I hate change... hugs!
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