It's been said that I am unlucky, that things happen and happen often... What is luck? Well, winning the lottery would definitely be lucky (MA Lottery Division, the $10 check doesn't quite count) and some would say finding the perfect parking spot or making it through all the lights and getting to that appointment on time is very lucky.
The ultimate judge of who is lucky and who isn't is really and simply you. I've always felt that I was lucky and stepped up into the unknown if the Universe said, it's time, do it... sometimes a little nudging helps and once or twice I believe that the Universe kicked me into it.
But, this is post about love which is very lucky indeed.
Once upon a time, way back when, the Bestest Eventing Buddy and I were planning our 2011 eventing season. You know... where you sit around in January and dream the big dreams of all that you and your ponies will do and all the fun you'll have. At one point, I said that it was the year that I would find a mate and marry living happily ever afterwards. We laughed the big laugh of hyenas... hmmm, was it that far fetched (oops, another post perhaps).
And then came OBNH Chandler Bing, a 4.5 month old foxhound puppy who in a great escape realized that leaving the barn was scarier than the climb down a 20 foot retaining wall to get back to his kennel. A badly broken elbow, surgery and then, he was mine. Chandler joined Jonah and became known as Da Boyz.This is a post about love, that deep, bottomless pit of love. That feeling that happens when everything comes together - that your foxhound wants to be closer to you than the lab who was bred to be your companion. That warm feeling of home when you enter a room and his crooked tail wags and he leans his body into yours grateful for your return.
And, that feeling of completeness as you take your pony out for a ride and your two friends are trotting and cantering with you as we all explore the new morning as the sun rises. Most of all that look he gives you in stillness, that look of confidence and adoration so secure was his knowledge that he was deeply loved in return.
Chandler was king from the moment of his birth to the final moments of life. He never doubted that he was loved, never wondered if he'd be fed and lived a very good life. Our adventures together were epic and I am so lucky that he was in my life.
My wish for us all is that we get to experience the confidence of being loved, knowing that we will be cared for and that someone will always have our best interest in mind.
My dear friend sent me this poem by Mary Oliver, Blackwater Woods, American Primitive Collection 1983
"to live in this world
you must be able
to do three things
to love what is mortal;
to hold it
against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go"
Chandler, you were my heart hound and per the Bestest Eventing Buddy, my husband. I will miss you terribly 12/22/10 - 6/26/21
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